GOD TAKES THE BEST AND LEAVES THE REST BEHIND TO BECOME BETTER
On Monday 22 June, almost a week before his death, Gonzi as we used to call him, wrote a mail to his brother Fr. Anand and I quote “I have begun realizing that I want to spend as much time as I can with Mae and you and with those I love and with whom I am not guaranteed much time”. Was his inner voice whispering to him that Providence had other plans for him? We shall never know. All we know for sure is this: that we shall sorely miss him, his jovial personality, his smile and his humour and most of all his willingness to listen and help. He detested conflicts and always looked for ways of conciliation and compromise and mediation.
On the blog that his friends in America have put on the Internet Gonzi has been described as a “Big Guy”. That he was; not only in his frame but in what counts most namely in his heart and in his head. There was something uniquely natural about him that put everyone at ease and filled the Gama Pais house when he was around. An exemplary and devoted son, he took a Sabbatical to spend almost six months with his Mother in Moira performing all sorts of household chores. He used to call her sometimes twice a day to chat and cheer her up.
It is really amazing- to quote his brother Fr. Anand – “that he almost lived his life for others in the family as well as in his profession”. This was probably precisely because of the difficulties he had to face as a child and student. He had to through the trauma of seeing the suffering and the untimely death at a young age of his father Caetano.Not deterred by any obstacles, he went on to study Agriculture at Dapholi in Maharashtra and Delhi and then on a Scholarship for a Doctoral Course in Entomology at Berkley, California. He however discovered that his vocation was connecting with people; so ultimately he did his PHD in Sociology at the University of Minnesota. Being a passionate Goan and proud of his roots in Moira, he preferred the sand and the seas of California and joined the Faculty of the State University of California at San Jose.
To die at such a young age means to have many dreams and hopes and plans unfulfilled and yet his Mother and brothers and nephews and niece who adored him were able to meet him one last time. And if we had to go up a thousand steps on our knees to bring our Gonzi back we would do it. But that is not possible. So we can only say: dear Gonzi, although you are no longer there where you were, you are now everywhere where we are, for we shall always remember and never forget you.
It is true that his sudden death has left the family and his dear ones speechless, distraught and stunned. Only the mothers among you’ll will fathom what this loss means to his mother and how devastated she is. But we also know that Gonzi , who never looked back and thought so positively, would like us to go about our daily lives and not be paralysed by sorrow. We have to be grateful that we had him as our friend and relative at least for a while. That God in the words of the Prophet Isaiah said “I have called you by name; you are mine” at such a young age is not for us to question but to accept.
Adieus Gonzi; may the Angels take you to Paradise and our Faith tells us that we shall all meet in the end when we come to dwell in the House of the Lord.
Fr. Anand da Gama Pais,
Goa, India.
Gonzaga's brother.
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